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   Wednesday, February 07, 2007
To all of you considering a career change, I recommend crime. It's America's largest growth industry, there's no Union, and your competition tends to be even dumber than you are. Plus, there's unequalled job security- If you choose to become a bank robber, for example, you know the bank won't be shipped overseas to be robbed for less by cheaper foreign labor. Not to mention the fact that from there, it's an easy jump to the world of Politics, where there's no actual work to be done once you've mastered the handshake. Beware though, there's considerably more competition for these jobs, as our elected officials have already shown that any idiot can do the job. Side benefits include the graft and corruption, as well as the standard debauchery. Extra debauchery if your last name happens to begin with a "K" and end with an "ennedy".



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